Random Rambled Rants

2009-01-12T18:06:00.001+08:00

ok blogger, it was fun while it lasted but i'm moving on now.

www.blackmusings.wordpress.com

2009-01-12T10:09:00.001+08:00

"One step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen when it's
Supposed to happen that we
Find the reasons why
One step at a time"

just a little bit more, i think this is the final stretch.
we're almost there.

2009-01-04T13:54:00.001+08:00

why?

2009-01-03T14:59:00.002+08:00

my msn subnick is "you only die once", but you know what, that's not true.

you die over and over and over again.

2009-01-02T00:02:00.001+08:00

at least we have each other.

2008-12-22T21:59:00.002+08:00

What is it like to escape? To be able to run away, to leave everything behind and just go? To know that despite everything that is keeping you back, you've already broken the shackles and have long gone.

Because i'd really like to know. I'd like to leave the reality that i'm in now and just disappear, to where ever. Be it the blackness of death, or the light of a new day that i will have to face somewhere else. I just want to know.

Because right now, there is a feeling gnawing inside me. A feeling i cannot quite describe, a feeling i cannot quite understand. A feeling that i have tried (and failed) chasing away with cigarettes and loud music.

A feeling that i want gone.

2008-12-22T12:23:00.002+08:00

Christmas is coming in a few days, so is the much anticipated hk jaunt with ying and sy and a VERY much anticipated nearly-2-week break from work (office is closed).

despite that Christmas is all about love, giving and sipping hot chocolate around a roaring fireplace (or bbq pit in my case, if it pulls through), i'm not feeling festive at all. Its like, oh, its christmas?

big whoop. it's just another public holiday of the year that is just more "special" because its commercialized as hell.

i was talking to the funny one last night, and amidst the WTFs and the LOLs and the bantering back and forth, i realized (ok i realized this a long time ago) that i have nothing to live for except my friends. don't get me wrong guys, i'd gladly cover a puddle of mud with my favourite leather jacket so you don't get your shoes dirty but..

imo, its not a good enough reason to live is it. they always say you you should do things for yourself, which i agree with totally but what happens when yourself has reached a point of apathy where you find yourself not wanting anything anymore?

all my proverbial mountains that i was planning to scale with an enthusiam that could rival a cheerleader's have crumbled. start an ad agency, bah. open a bar, if it happens it happens lor. backpack around asia, meh.

"dont think so much" is pretty much the answer ive been getting. Thats besides the point. What difference does it make if i think about it or not? It's not like im going to be some emokid overnight and kill myself. I cant be bothered to, in any case. Too much of a hassle.

im tired of living life like this- just stumbling through the days and doing the minimum to survive. or barely the minimum, since i seem to be surviving on a diet of cigarettes and a few mouthfuls of whatever whenever.

so,

Dear Santa,

All i want for christmas this year is discover that there is something i want to fight for. something that i will throw my entire self into and stick with to the bitter end. something that will see me battered, but contented.

something that i will care about.

OKAY. call me crazy but after writing all that, i think i kinda like this life of apathy at the same time.

what is happening to me. god.

2008-12-11T21:52:00.002+08:00

because im bored, because i havent posted a thing since december started and mainly because im waiting for the chance to hang out of my window and smoke, i'll do a xmas wish list to kill some time:

1. semi-shiny black riding boots with no/1-inch heel
2. dark blue skinnies with orange/white stiching
3. boxy steel grey messenger bag
4. black, red and gold havianas (yes i know they're overrated)
5. A DRAWING TABLET
6. the new macbook pro!
7. red/black crocodile skin clutch
8. honey toned crocodile skin heels
9. about $6000
10. gift vouchers to taka or tangs
11. drop 5-10kg overnight (ha)
12. 5 containers of take away peach fro-yo from yami yoghurt WITH granola and strawberry topping
13. A JEEP!
14. a queen sized futon and black sheets
15. a black drop chandelier
16. a carton of viceroy menthol lights
17. a kitty AND money to raise it properly
18. deep red leather jacket
19. one black and one silver lipring
20. shades
21. a good reason to live, and not live for the sake of living because dammit i really have no fucking clue why im here
22. more freelance job offers to keep me alive
23. a safe trip to hk and back from hk
24. huge ass gothic chunky bangles from Burberry
25. many many many epic nights

and.. dammit i still hear the tv.

2008-11-22T19:16:00.003+08:00

i want to blog something about how i feel, but since i have no idea how to describe how im feeling right now, i think i'll just leave it here.

on a side note, i really need money badly.

2008-11-17T17:07:00.000+08:00

pre book in amusement.

really, thanks.

2008-11-15T13:46:00.002+08:00

i want to...

get into the car, drive far far far far far far away where no one can reach me or bother me.

then hopefully at the end of the far far far far far away road im driving on is a cliff.

whee.

2008-11-14T11:06:00.002+08:00

to being extremely bored!

2008-10-26T18:19:00.002+08:00

i fucking hate people who go against their words by pretending they never said/promised such a thing.

FUCK.

2008-10-26T14:47:00.007+08:00

the epic weekend.

to backtrack, Sy and I have officially been added to the Traffic Police's list of legal drivers. We got a car for the weekend, and the weekend is still going strong baby.

Met the Newly Skinny One and the Tall One yesterday and pretty much just drove around.

posing you know who.

act coy ftw/ftl

NYAHAHAHAHA.

oh doesn't this look oh-so familiar.

awesome foursome.

teh newly skinny one!

wub you nong nong tiem.

that's my "singyi, what the FUCK?" look.

can someone please tell the bitch she isn't fat?

awww.

so now i'm waiting for Sy to come get me so we can go to where ever and do something. and pick poor Timmy up from work later.

kbai.

2008-10-21T01:22:00.002+08:00

timmy is mumbling to himself.

i'd ask him why but he's gripping his mouse so tightly and staring into the screen so intently i think i'll just stfu and sit here COLD AND LONELY on his bed.

love you too hon, love you too. =D

my life, as well as those of my nearest and dearest has taken turns for the.. weird. another log of memories to fall back on. i'm glad im not a sentimental person.

work has been better. because i actually have work to do. I FEEL ALIVE.

i'm really just blogging because im bored and sleep isnt kicking in.

timmy is still mumbling to himself..

2008-10-13T16:08:00.003+08:00

The day we went to zouk and terrorized the dance floor.

EEEE YING CHEAT.

and then gulg gulg gulg.

to nom!

nommed.

the nom effect.

im so fecking bored at work ive been blogging more often. hopefully this changes and i ACTUALLY START GETTING PROPER WORK.

ok i have but it's not enough to keep me in the office until 8 like the others and i feel guilty for leaving early all the time.

kbai.

2008-10-09T11:04:00.002+08:00

going to Spinelli's after work with Ying and Sy is possibly one of the few things to look forward to while i'm cold and bored at the office.

I'M. PRACTICALLY. NOT. DOING. ANYTHING.

fine, there have been 3 drinking sessions in the last two weeks with the office but still.

man my mouth can open.

THIS IS FUCKING HILARIOUS. HAHAHAHAHA.

Anorexic bitch.

NAWWW! so precious.

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA LOLLERSKATES.

we were at an ad seminar yesterday and the only 2 questions that were asked by a NAFA and Laselle student were possibly the stupidest i've heard:

"will traditional media ever die out?" and "when is an appropriate time to use humor in advertising".

common sense, not so common after all!

2008-09-21T22:38:00.003+08:00

Finky Finky, where for art thou Finky?

We miss you squirrel man, why did you have to go to Hong Kong?! Who's going to make all the dead mother jokes with me now?

Bah. See you during Christmas you fool, Sy and i have practically booked tickets already.

and, introducing the latest love of my life (sorry Timmy)

kbai.

2008-09-08T16:44:00.002+08:00

if there's anything i loathe more than ridiculously chirpy "class gatherings" or neon orange/green/yellow/purple and black stripped tops, it would be having to settle for being second best.

especially where it counts the most.

2008-08-30T21:11:00.000+08:00

you're all morons.

2008-08-19T21:38:00.003+08:00

i think the act of me writing "filial piety." for a 10 mark question today couldnt be more appropriate a marker of the last day of school (in a sense that i dont have to physically go back to school).

it feels weird, not in a bad way, just a it-feels-weird kinda weird. no more lecture halls, no more trudging up the hill to FMS cursing like i was a melting snowman, no more smoking with ____ in the stairwells at 56, no more sticking of voodoo pins into soap dolls fashioned into group mates' likeness and no more snickering at weird ass outfits (including my own).

for the sake of TRYING to invoke some sense of nostalgia -something ruiming claims i do not have- i went to read the very blog post i wrote regarding school.

it seemed i liked lectures (good god), managed to destroy my ipod mini by failing to cap a bottle of 100 plus properly, went for track (my my!) and got pass not knowing how to use my laptop (which incidentally has really been through thick and thin with me the past 3 years).

it has been interesting. it's pretty hard to take that all there is to show for 3 years worth of blood, sweat, blackened lungs and $6000 is just a piece of paper that declares me as a Ngee Ann Mass Comm graduate.

now, about a month left to rack up as much internship gear -as ying puts it- possible, finish up driving for good, lose 5-10kg and catch up on all the sleep i've been missing out on the last 3 years.

after that, i'm off into the cold, cruel world to slog it out for minimum pay and (hopefully) maximum work experience.

and then i'll be done with Ngee Ann for good.

whoa.

2008-08-10T15:59:00.003+08:00

like it isnt bad enough i have to experience it in real life, ive got to go dream about too.

peachy.

there's been so much negativity in the past 24 hours that i will think of positive stuff now.

there's:

-suit shopping with the finky
-Skinny Dinner with sy
-a photojourn assignment to finish by thursday
-arab street-ing with ying
-a party to plan

2008-08-05T01:09:00.003+08:00

its funny, ok not so funny, how late nights and an imbalance of hormones can causes one to plunge into the pits of depression (rather, extreme unhappiness because depression is severe but in this case is the perfect word) so easily.

i imagine it would be like being in Azkaban, where the lowest and most terrible points in your life keep flashing by in your head like a lousy movie you're stuck watching- you dont want to, but you're just stuck there.

its almost comical how the smallest of things can cause the most massive of all mood swings.

i need a cigarette or two.

i wish i could go to a cliff, one that is reddish, and where i'll be facing a very orange sunset. the earth beneath my feet will be crumbly, but firm, and the air alive with sounds of the desert. i will be wearing monochrome preferably, with a splash of colour for shoes.

i will be alone.

and then i will step off the cliff, but i wont fall, and i wont die. i'll just fly off to goodness knows where because the wind will be able to carry me. in my head i will be thinking "the hell with all of you", and from the moment my feet left the ground, all chains (metaphorical) that bound me to the earth will have vanished and then i'd be free.

maybe if i thought about it enough, i'd dream it later. its better than nothing.

2008-07-25T08:40:00.003+08:00

I'm waiting for a Home Electricity test to start. I don't even know why i'm here because i'm definitely going to fail. I don't even have a calculator.

Anyway check these ads out. They're my favourites. Credits to DDB Australia.

I LOVE THE LITTLE TOMATO.

There are a whole bunch of other awesome ads that i'm too lazy to look for in the archives and post here but..

www.adsoftheworld.com

I'm so sick right now it's not even funny. And i think i made Timmy sick too :(

2008-07-23T00:07:00.003+08:00

i feel like hanging myself.

not yet, but come the 31st i just might. ive been reading wikiHow on how to make a noose and it's not hard.

i also feel like killing a number of people for various reasons that range from being minor to not-so-minor.

i am in a very hostile and volatile mood.

and along with this reinstated rage grows the budding tendrils of depression.

i feel like hanging myself.

on a slightly brighter note, depending on how i decide to look at it, i have yet more things added to my want list!

-a DS Lite (damn you Ying and your cooking games)
-deep purple leather heels
-boxy dark coloured dress (navy preferably)
-chunky brown boho inspired heels with straps that cross at the ankles
-knee length gladiator sandals (black)
-ankle length Kenneth Cole inspired gladiator sandals (black)
-red clutch from warehouse
-steel gray messenger bag (leather)
-new black leggings

i know this is terribly materialistic, but it's also awfully therapeutic.

Ivan

2008-07-12T18:33:00.002+08:00

Ivan, originally uploaded by Mona SY Teo.

this was an epic moment. probably one of the more relaxing ones ever since i realized advert final presentation is next fucking week and that we are kinda fucked for IMC.

i just finished driving. i seriously need to get my license asap.

i have a wish list:

-3g iphone vs. sidekick?
-semi-high waisted gray wool pants
-suede/goat's hair red flats
-red leather heels
-gray leather pumps with white heels
-turquoise snakeskin flats
-purple faux alligator skin handbag

considering that i haven't been working, i have no idea how i'm going to actually get all that. still, it's nice to hope. it's terribly materialistic but, OHWELL.

2008-06-22T04:42:00.005+08:00

i just got home from work, and by work i really mean "serving 40 year old brats".

i guess i will be rambling. i'm really tired, but i cannot sleep. i haven't updated in a pretty long time, so this is pretty much in response to Sy's tag.

i've been thinking about the future alot recently. it might be the fact that graduation is nearing, or it might have been the tuna i had for lunch. on the whole i think it's the latter but anyway.

you once said, "what's good a dream if you don't have anyone to share it with".

i have been thinking about that in relation to my nicely-figured-out-practically-colour-coded-future, and also to things i've been witness to.

i'm quite a control freak when it comes to the bigger things (and certain smaller things) that concern my future, and i've never liked the whole "taking things a step at a time" mindset. i've seen what happens when you don't plan properly, especially the consequences. they're not pretty.

(i do have a point, at the end of all this)

i can also pretty much safely say i've never experienced loneliness. i've been fortunate enough to always have had someone by my side. Whether that someone was one whom i shared kisses with, or clothes with, there has always been someone. and i believe that is because i've made sure i never have to, because loneliness is a terrible thing to experience. it's happening to people i know now, and i can't do jack shit about it.

i don't wish loneliness upon anybody I TRULY CARE ABOUT, and if that loneliness is the consequence of my stubborn determination to pursue my picture perfect plans of the future, then well,

what's good a dream with no one to share it with indeed.

byebye, pink colour coded dream. maybe another day :)

2008-06-20T18:09:00.002+08:00

the list of people i want dead is growing exponentially.

especially you, my entire life is completely upside down now.

thanks.

2008-05-09T15:17:00.005+08:00

planning for My Great Expedition to Finland is underway.

glass igloo!

its the most awesomest thing since the underwater hotel thing in Turkey.

this time next year, hopefully.

2008-05-07T20:13:00.002+08:00

for the next few days, i predict routine.

gmail, refresh refresh refresh refresh.
hotmail, refresh refresh refresh refresh.

bloody internship.

you drug.

2008-04-27T17:51:00.000+08:00

happy 1 year 7 months timmeh.

=)

2008-04-13T01:38:00.003+08:00

this picture is of us at Weelong's birthday. this picture also symbolizes the millionth time ive written and deleted this post.

well.

ive been spending money like its going out of fashion, not so funnily ON fashion. there was practically something new every week. had 7.5 kg worth of clothes shipped over from HongKong for me and Sy, one dress from American Apparel and various other not-so-economical store bought products.

in fact, i just picked up my new jeans from Tough and bought 3 Bedhead products today!

AND im eyeing something else right now.

this is saying alot, considering i always hated spring/summer. maybe im depressed. or not.

the entire holidays has been completely unproductive. while im inclined to believe i DESERVE a restful and lazy holiday, my need-to-be-completed soon portfolio/resume says otherwise.

pretty much been hanging out with the Timmeh and working. and working and Timmeh. you get the idea.

Timmeh's concert tomorrow!

2008-03-27T02:27:00.002+08:00

happy 1 year and 6 months babeh.

2008-03-08T02:44:00.003+08:00

you wish you could turn back time, but you cant.

you wish you could be given the chance to do something differently, but you cant.

you wish for all the world that things would turn out fine, but that's all you can do- wish.

then, realization.

things COULD have gone the way you wanted- if only you had been less of a coward.

if only you had not just thought for yourself. if only you had been brave enough to do the fucking right thing.

if only you had trusted yourself more.

because there will always be alternatives.

because there will always be second chances.

not anymore.

nope, no more turning back.

because what's has been done, has indeed been fucking done.

if only.

2008-02-27T06:09:00.000+08:00

happy 1 yr 5 mth honey.

xoxo.

2008-02-25T12:46:00.002+08:00

i've been binging on caviar and sushi.

i've been playing "how to save a life" on loop.

i've been lying in bed and staring at the ceiling for hours on end.

i don't think its quite depression yet, but i'm getting there.

i reallyreally miss you. i'm sorry i didn't think i would.

in fact, i'm just sorry.

2008-01-20T18:59:00.000+08:00

im still fooling around and getting used to my d40x. no pretty pictures that im in love with, yet, hopefully.

creative journal is now 10 pages! another 40 to go. due 29th. hahahaha. help me.

i just got my pay, but i am already very broke.

pic's from dan's 19th.

harry's @ dempsey

oooh suave.

hope you enjoyed yourself.

there are actually alot more photos but ah.

2008-01-07T13:05:00.001+08:00

yesterday was a random outing to arab street for some shisha lovin'.

i love how ive been spamming photos.

nyeh eh eh eh eh eh.

cushions are for lying.

and apparently, im seducing jia wei.

omg jiawei you never looked better! my phone rocks.

jia wei's manly hands.

dont know what mr holiday inn back there is doing.

retarded psychedelic and pointy boobs person

heh heh bald.

jia wei, you never looked smaller.

hehex

tsssssk tssssssk

urg.

he's always right.

cheeks!

haiiii

LOL LOOK AT SY

and then we proceeded to casuarina to gorge ourselves.

"im hungry. so?"

fking btt later. fa2 due friday. radio test on friday. nooooooo!

FLUFFY PUFF!

2008-01-02T19:01:00.000+08:00

hello, 2008.

i have no idea what's going to happen so let's take things as it goes and not put any unnecessary pressure on myself.

what's the use of the planning. the only thing im aiming for is getting into miami ad school and there's only SO much i can do.

2007 was a very.. experimental year, for the lack of words.

so... photos.

harry's bar, harbourfront centre.

this new year was relatively low key in comparison to last year's. i had fun nonetheless. its always fun when you get to "celebrate" cheesy shit like "new year" with people you know who couldnt care less about it either.

kind of like the anti celebration, but there you go.

timmeh!

look at guns. emo 101.

nyeh eh eh eh eh eh.

camwhore 101.

then sy invaded. and yes that's an iphone, which is on my 2008 covet list.

proceeding to terrorize a very apathetic kc.

kc!

urhh.

half a kc.

uurrrrhhh 2.

yeccch at face.

slightly skeezy, pervy face.

...okay maybe the only resolution i'll make it is to make sure that ivan and i get the nod for the internship, and to wrangle tim and jiawei an internship in bangkok too.

words cannot describe how awesome it will be if the four of us get to intern together. overseas, no less.

2007-12-28T15:18:00.000+08:00

christmas (defined as christmas eve to boxing day) was a blast this year.

this year, christmas was about..

timmy, of course.

xmas eve dinner at timmy's place

wrapping gifts in the sunday comics..

receiving cool gifts..

eating apple strudel cookies!

calling the best friend at midnight to wish her merry xmas..

snuggling in timmy's warm bed..

12 am tampon runs to 7/11..

bleary camwhoring sessions just for this post..

"borrowing" shopping carts from Markerplace..

because buying enough food to cook for 7 is very heavy..

and the only man available to help was sleeping.

it was beyond funny.

but at the end of the day,

xmas is about love!

so.. how was your christmas?

2007-12-22T15:40:00.000+08:00

today, we mark the day of the TANGYUAN.

damn those little round balls of doughy, chewy pleasure. my mom actually cooked 200 (using the biggest pasta pot we own, which is roughly around the height of my calves) of them so by the time this day is over, i'll be as round as one too!

im sitting here waiting for singyi to come over so we can have a totally girly and out-of-character day and dye our hair. Courtesy of Guardian.

this is so sec 2/3/4 omg!

and then we will go to daddy's dinner and dance, which sounds quite glam, but is in reality just stuffing our faces with free food, making small, pretentious chat with old farts, sneaking off for ciggies and then complaining how fat we are after everything is over.

life hasn't been really interesting. going out in the day with singyi, going to timmy's at night and then skulking back early in the morning.

routine, routine.

i'm quite, but not very excited about christmas.

still, DSLR soon! and im going to get the CAD season one dvd to watch. the holidays are getting too boring.

2007-12-19T00:14:00.000+08:00

i hate virtual communication.

and i loathe this.

2007-12-10T00:43:00.000+08:00

i like knowing that one day i'll wake up and find myself dead.

it was pointless to begin with, and pointless its going to stay.

thank you for the wake up calll.

2007-12-09T13:52:00.000+08:00

once again, i went off the beaten track.

Mok, Singyi and I visited the Toy Museum yesterday. It's at Seah street, and it costs $8 to get in.

The stuff there! I swear if i sold everything, id be able to literally roll in wads of cash.

an old popeye ride that was made in France in 1930.

really long hopscotch!

playing really long hopscotch.

almost home.

no more hopscotch. :(

they had "the authentic beatles wig" on display too.

death on a glass floor.

ahh some twit-ishness here.

i'm not falling.

the mok!

obscene singyi.

biggest bolster in the world.

ancient Archie Comics!

again.

Original Cinderalla movie poster.

5 little nigger boys. LOL.

my daily dose of singyi retardation.

heh. 3 eighteen-year-olds frolicking around a museum. lol.

it was work after that.

and i fucking dropped my visa behind some counter at work and god knows if i can get it back.

last week of school will commence in about 23 hours. HOO HAH.

2007-11-28T09:56:00.000+08:00

happy belated 1yr2mths baby!

i'm in commissues!

my second time in 7 weeks!

i'm quite sure this module is supposed to be in-depth and interesting with loads of food for thought and all, but dammit.

and its an examinable module. kill me.

tons of things to do;

1. FA1 to be edited, when i get it back.
2. Press release to edit
3. Finish up radio script
4.Gather up WebD contents
5. Start the 50-page creative journal.

With the exception of number 5, everything else is due BY FRIDAY.

PLUS.

1. new release test tomorrow
2. radio 10min talkshow practical test on fri.

and now i lay me down to sleep...

so i'm taking driving. my basic theory test isnt until jan so... i dont get to do damage to beautiful singapore roads until then.

anyway apparently my christmas/new year break is 3 weeks long instead of two, so the little hamsters wheels inside my head are spinning.

3 day jaunt to Bangkok, anyone?

work later.

&#$%&%)@%

2007-11-22T10:23:00.000+08:00

~~"you're not good enough"~~

stop focusing on the 'not good enough' and focus on the 'you'.

please.

(both spoken AND unspoken, by the way)

i hope the internship goes through. 4 months in bangkok sounds heavenly.

/edit

funny how the simplest things can turn your mood around so quickly.

4 months in bangkok is still heavenly, though.

2007-11-20T15:17:00.001+08:00

hello dream school.

im at lecture. the two people on either side of me are too engrossed in Diablo 2 to care about me.

heh.

(timmeh just added " i care about you")

anyway Miami Ad School. I'm in love. I just read the Art Direction syllabus and oh my freaking god. i may have blogged about this before but what the heck. i'd kill to get in.

i want my macbook pro soon. the ibook is slowly but surely, dying.

i want my DSLR too.

meh. money.

2007-11-18T21:06:00.000+08:00

So today is my big 1-8,

and the celebrations are already over.

Friday

Dinner with Singyi at Charcoal. The premium beef was orgasmic. I wish i had more money, then i could eat there more often.

Vivo City for nonexistent eggtarts, tu tu kueh and smoothies after that. Bummed around the sky park and took a little trip down memory lane.

Ivan joined us for a little bit and brought chocolate from Candy Empire. and then i went to go crash Timmeh's.

Yesterday

I had an awesome time yesterday.

First was a really good dinner with Timmy and his mom at the country club. His mom is way too nice to me ah. No pictures here but god the soup was really good. And the mushrooms.

Cafe Iguana with Prashant, Peter and Timmeh.

he's cuter than Mr.Mittens.

he's higher than high.

random expressions.

no ah, i dont know why my hair looks so fucked up here.

i wont say it.

that's better

TIMMEH. ROAR.

happy people. happy salsa.

i has cake. yoo no has cake.

i cut cake.

the watering hole.

timmeh says 'meh'

timmeh looks korean.

siAla AcTioN siAL~ (id kill for that face structure)

i love you baby.

thanks for the best birthday guys!

Candice joined us and we went to Living Room @ Mariott and THEN to B 1, a little club also at Mariott.

left the place around 5 and then we went down to Shant's for a bit. Timmy followed me home in the morning and we slept in.

and then we ordered pizza. mmmm.

A big hell of a THANK YOU to Prashant, for putting in effort to organize something for me. hugs and kisses there!

Comm issues is due sometime next week. Problem is, i dont know when and i dont know WHAT.

And lets not forget feature writing.

at least there's no school tomorrow.

2007-11-08T03:29:00.000+08:00

school has started for about 4 weeks now.

i find myself drifting through the days, not really knowing what im doing or why im doing it. i guess i havent got a motivation. in secondary school, ngeeann masscomm was my goal, my dream. i had something to work for.

now i dont.

university is just a great big blur. sure, i pretty much mapped out what i want to do with my life for the next 5 years but who's to say its going to go the way i want.

the only thing im looking forward to is the overseas internship next year. kiasu me is already sourcing and trying to secure contacts for Ivan, myself and hopefully Timmy.

4 months is a long time.

i think it would be awesome to get away from singapore for 4 months. maybe i'll come back with a more positive outlook on things.

imagine going to bangkok or new york for 4 months. damn sweet i tell you.

sigh.

i dont like myself introspective. like i want to sit somewhere quiet and smoke my way through a packet of ciggies.

which i imagine won't be very good for me the next day.

on a brighter note, payday is coming. i get to reap the rewards my patience has brought me. honestly, i never gave a damn how your day was, i only did it to get a drink out of you. or to up my bottle sales. or make it look as though i was working hard. take your pick.

(although to be honest, there IS a small handful (very very small) of customers whom i'm actually glad to see. now these are the people who get a sincere how-was-your-day from me.)

in any case,

i have decided to bring the camera with me everywhere i go until i think ive got enough photos for the webd journal.

i might actually enjoy this assignment.

thank goodness for the little things that make this life alot more bearable.

a random thought about materialism;
does coveting die off after a while?

2007-11-05T19:45:00.000+08:00

bunch of photos ive been meaning to upload.

halloween 07, masquarade.

mok at masquarade.

your typical tall, dark, mysterious stranger.

cute lil' geisha girl.

yeah yeah this was just for laughs.

halloween 07, DHL balloon

something about the water droplets.

now with a tinge of red..

yes, a brick floor.

a little dash of colour.

red compliments green

heineken>tiger beer.

this one's for you, Mark.

oh yeah, Mark the Hulk.

halloween 07, Caesars

Bonnie, Sy and I.

some of the staff..

one more staff..

one big happy family.

aye..

bonnie, edwin and me.

leonard, you SUCK at taking photos.

arvin!

kris!

Mark! (again)

Sy and I =)

was pretty fun working that day, didn't have to smile and no one could blame me. i love the whole dead person theme.

so.. we had a lolita, a french maid, a japanese high school girl, a japanese primary school girl and a nurse. what a halloween cliche.

there are a few photos of me, bonnie, mark and sy at zouk, but they are somewhere. with someone.

the day we got cheated.

jia wei in fear. ivan in uncontainable glee.

tsk. look at the emo guns.

now look at my SHOES.

greed.

REVENGE i say, REVENGE.

a hella long time ago.

the best friend and i. (yes on the balloon)

i'm the definition of a city girl, but i wouldnt mind these lights being killed now and then so we can actually look at stars.

so i've been on the balloon twice, and that's more than enough for this lifetime.

school is getting to me, and so is lethargy.

i'd like some apple pie.

2007-10-24T00:20:00.000+08:00

i believe there is a law of economics out there that goes something like,

1 supply for 1 demand.

so fuck all of you for expecting 1 supply to completely satisfy the needs from 4 demands. it doesn't work. not now. not ever.

and if im not doing enough, i'm sorry i'm only human.

i wish i could pack a spanking new DSLR, the black macbook i bought in a recent dream and fuck off to god knows where and never come back.

thank you for the comforting smell of apple/laundry on your shirt(s) and the warm hugs.

2007-10-08T16:00:00.000+08:00

got a couple of minutes before Singyi comes and picks me up in a cab and then the eight hours of hello-how-are-you-what-would-you-like-to-drink will begin.

not that i'm complaining. at least i have something to do.

i think people will agree with me when i say that the holidays screw up alot of things.

2007-10-03T03:15:00.001+08:00

i should be asleep, for i have work tomorrow.

then again work is at 5 so..

ANYWAY.

pictures from Lunar Bar opening night.

THE suave one who got us the invites.

the mad fool.

5'7'' of utter hotness, and he's all mine =)

me with the annoying kissy faces and him with the tequila orange. or vodka orange.

the place is pretty awesome. Chinese inspired. it was crazy packed that day, but who's to say no to free flow of drinks?

and now i shall go to bed.

"yay i'm a doctor" is still making me smile

2007-10-01T06:53:00.000+08:00

living up to other people's expectations is hard,

living up to your own expectations is harder.

2007-09-26T23:52:00.000+08:00

Happy one year my darling Timmy.

i love you =)

2007-09-18T18:23:00.001+08:00

if i ever scream, "lets go to OCH!!" at 3am in the morning again, then im around a 7 on a scale of 1-10 in the context of being high.

so the chalet was pretty good. booze+crazy people is always a winning combination.

anyway it felt good doing something other than work and staying at home. it really helped to break the monotony of the whole holiday cycle.

work sleep work sleep work sleep.

and the occasional crash-timmy's-place, thought that never gets old.

i want to say something about how friends and getting together is nice etc etc (which it is) but im still pretty damn blur so i'll just stop here.

quote of yesterday: im too sober!

2007-09-01T13:58:00.000+08:00

pictures of the FMS alumni homecoming yesterday night.

Ying doing stuff to the vines for our booth.

this is the definition of an oxymoron.

and i start my artsy nonsense. if you can even call it artsy, that is.

drops of silver.

Stila products.

Lo and behold, my own name card.

silver greens.

live for the shadows.

reflections.

drums.

water bottles with our 'company's' name.

our booth.

getting slightly bored.

Ying and her glasses.

again.

half a Vera.

grin.

CLEMENT!!!

sia.

again.

damn cute please.

hur.

tired.

bored.

emokid. lol

yin/yang

macbook pros have the nicest texture

a flower for you

a Vera

honestly? i dont know what we were doing either.

okok CAMWHORE.

texture.

work in about 3 1/2 hours time.

im still falling for you.

2007-08-30T12:42:00.000+08:00

so i start work soon.

and i need to clear my head. im pmsing like crazy, and its not good for anyone.

2007-08-29T22:00:00.000+08:00

dont laugh, mock or sneer.

1. How are you feeling today?
assuming im in an alternate universe where i just won the first prize for today's 4D, id be beyond happy. but since that didnt happen, im a 3 on a scale of 1 to 10.

2. Where did you go yesterday?
work orientation and timmy's.

3. Who do you miss badly?
badly? no one.

4. What are you doing now?
arent you a regular einstein. doing this, duh.

5. Honestly, are you a racist?
honestly, no.

6. Do you like rock/hardcore music?
rock i guess. i dunno, dont listen to music alot.

7. What's your hobby?
uhh. wow maybe, hanging out with tim and sy and the rest. timmy's bed, yeah definitely his bed. reading. you know, typical healthy teenage stuff.

8. Where do you wanna go right now?
no where really. thailand?

9. What do you see in life?
a big waste time with added bonuses to make the time go by faster.

10. If you could do anything that's without punishment, what'd you do?
ROB A BANK. (and kill a person or two for kicks)

11. Do you follow the law?
more or less?

12. Are you considered a happy person?
pretty much.

13. Where are your siblings?
in his room.

14. Do you smoke alot?
'alot' is subjective.

15. Do you drink alot?
no.

16. What do you think about cats/kittens?
freaking adorable.

17. Do you still watch Barney?
if by watch you mean occasionally see him dance around in my head (black backdrop here) then yeah.

18. Anyone who has inspired you in any ways?
dont make me laugh.

19. Do you like being in school?
its ok.

20. Are you anti-social?
i try not to be.

21. Do you trust your friends easily?
no.

22. Ever betrayed the person you cared the most for?
if i was fucking drunk and damn high, i might act out of character and do something that i regret doing but otherwise no. id never.

23. What's on your mind right now?
pickles.

24. Rain, sun or windy?
wind.

25. Are you in love?
call me little miss tied down and throw a bouquet of flowers at me.

26. What's your sister doing?
what makes you think i have a sister?

27. Ever been to a dog show?
Nope

28. Do you eat pork?
i love ham. and salami. and pepperoni. and sausages. oh and bacon, musnt forget bacon.

29. Ever gotten Dengue Fever?
no. mosquitoes dont come near me for some reason.

30. If you can have 1 super power, what'd it be?
teleport! think of all the cab fare i'd be saving.

31. Where do you study & do you like it?
ngee ann, mass comm. its a love hate thing.

32. Anything that's bothering you right now?
oh yeah. nothing a cigarette or two.. or three won't cure/

33. Ocean, sea, river or swimming pool?
the ocean.

34. Have you ever been to UK?
no.

35. What surprises you?
these days? nothing.

36. What time is it now?
11 52 pm.

37. Are you home-sick?
with regard to recent events, i'll be politically smart and not answer this right now.

38. Do you wanna go out & shop?
i wanna go out & get money so i can go out & shop.

39. What do you hate the most?
lizards.

40. Remember your past?
of course.

fuck this. i need a smoke.

2007-08-28T14:23:00.000+08:00

so hello.

its pouring like mad, and i dont relish the idea of having to go out.

the interview yesterday went ok, but im still not hired. i have some orientation thing to go to today before they decide whether they want me or not.

and then there's another interview tomorrow for a job that pays more.

i hate such states of paralysis.

i havent smoked in 3 days, and not to sound like a crazed addict or anything, but my head is pounding is like mad.

i have vcds to return, and i bet they're all overdue already.

and i have tons of weight to lose. i havent got the bleeding motivation to go out and run. help me.

i need a job asap. i need to do something. staying at home means i'll snack while gaming, and going out means spending money on food.

and there's still that advertising presentation that i hope pulls through.

and im so in love with a pair of Ted Baker pants. i think they'd look really good with a pair of black stilettos.

2007-08-27T00:48:00.000+08:00

i just finished stealth bombing a few cannons and peons and im ready to call it a day.

i am so unemployed.

nearly got a job a Mezzerah, or Mezzarah or was it Mezziah at clarke quay. someone correct me, if i get hired there, i better know how to spell the bar's name.

its a pretty nice place that offers shisha and stuff but curse my mother for not conceiving me earlier and thus allowing me to have a birthdate that falls within the first quarter of the year. i'm not as 18 as the bar wants me to be.

the manager guy says he'll call me back after he checks something. sigh.

so tomorrow i got 2 interviews set up, along with the uncounted few in the classifieds.

im getting sick of filling in application forms.

time to go watch a few animes and then cab home.

note: timmy has incredibly sharp teeth.

2007-08-19T12:33:00.000+08:00

the days left in this house is slowly dwindling.

forget the imac, i need the money for a better cause.

2007-08-18T02:11:00.000+08:00

we go through many emotions in our lifetime, and the more common ones would be happiness, sadness and anger.

funny how that at extremes stages of these emotions, our body expresses it through crying.

"what good is a dream come true if you have no one to share it with"

2007-08-09T19:07:00.000+08:00

timmy's like <-> close to hitting 70!

so.

im updating more! not that anyone cares but ive got MORE free time on my hands now that most of the stuff is over.

and it feels weird to be on holiday today.

anyway. mom went to bangkok and look what i got.

i know its a gay pink, but i guess it not really nice to steal my brother's black one and make him use this one so...

i know its a fake iPod, but at least it works. and its 4G and has a folder for text files so hello to new thumbdrive.

its irrinoyingly cute. and its so light. ive been throwing it around timmy's face for the past 1/2 hour and disturbing his leveling process.

heh heh. =D

so. i'll be leaving soon and going down to Vivo to meet Sy. if we catch the fireworks yay, if not who cares.

for the day that happens to be the nation's birthday, its been pretty good.

mwah to you.

2007-08-08T16:56:00.000+08:00

so tv pro is done for good.

was just watching what we did and surprisingly, it wasnt too bad.

now im at the atrium waiting for Timmy. nice breezy day it is. Ying is cursing InDesign and people are eating ice cream.

im done with the slides for MM presentation so i can not worry about until friday. i dont know what im going to do about MRM exam, but im not too concerned about that right now.

im more worried about my face ah. i know, i know, im being a bimbo but fuck. ive never seen my skin this sallow in my entire life. its puffy and round too, hoho.

oh yes, my hair is falling out.

im getting quite freaked. all i need to do is run my fingers through my hair when im putting leave on and like. BOOM. lotsa hair just gets threaded around my fingers.

tsk.

i cant wait for all this to be over so i can get my life back.

for two months, at least.

QUEK SINGYI, i want to go harbouring soon please.

2007-08-04T11:28:00.000+08:00

life is just one endless loop of problems.

there, i just figured out the meaning of life. sometimes i cant help but think we're like, characters from the Sims and the powers above are playing us like a computer game for amusement.

and like, when the want new characters and are sick of us, they kill us of i.e, Swim-> Sell Ladder

anyway. im on bed. and i pretty much intend to stay here until i go out later. like, at 9pm or so. everything is almost over. just mm, which is just about chucking slides together, and newswriting, which is just about hell.

advertising was totally worth all the money, the frustration and the kill-me-now moments and all those sleepless nights. im totally convinced to take creative advertising in year 3. totally and utterly convinced.

mrm was... mrm. (mmmmmerm)

tv pro was scary, but it went ok.

so. just the aforementioned modules and 2 exams left. i can already smell the freedom.

2007-07-30T16:48:00.000+08:00

Happy 10 months!

pie is nice. premade pie crust is nicer. self-made pie crust is funny. soggy pie is funnier.

butter cookies are nice too. especially those with boobs and dicks.

lolololol.

twas a nice weekend.

i still love falling asleep with you

2007-07-19T10:45:00.000+08:00

Dear Mass Comm,

This is not an easy thing to say, believe me, but.. i think i have to.

IM STARTING TO FUCKING HATE YOU.

I mean, you're very nice to me- somewhat. i will graduate with a decent diploma from a decent school, and i think i have made some very nice friends here, along with the best boyfriend anyone can ask for, but guess what, that's NOT the point.

I'm going insane, my entire advertising group is <--> this close to stripping naked, climbing onto the nearest water tower (do we have any of those?) and start gunning down people.

Why, last night we all fell asleep on Ying's extremely hard floor. It is one of the hardest floors i've felt but there you go. We even did the thriller dance on the way back to her place from 7-11. At 3 am.

And i haven't mentioned MRM, MM, Newswriting OR Tv pro, all of which i believe im pretty screwed for.

Le sigh.

We had such an awesome relationship! Why did you have to ruin it? WHY? DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!!! I came in, excited- ok, SOMEWHAT excited and like, well, happy i managed to get in. First you killed my dreams of being a journalist because I EFFING HATE newswriting, and now this eh? Ingrate.

I would go on, but i need to start drawing the layout for the damn newspaper. Now that you know how i feel, please do something and stop FUCKING KILLING ME ALREADY. WHY?! Does it give you some sadistic pleasure to see 200 students SUFFERING IN YOUR HANDS?! HUH?! Jesus.

Fine fine, im going already.

XOXO,
Mona

pft.

if not for tim, sy and kc and wow, i think i'd be in a spiffy new straitjacket by now.

yeah i know im not the only one. good luck y'all, i feel your pain. 4 more weeks, 4 more weeks.

for laughs. we need more of that.

2007-07-10T10:00:00.000+08:00

timmy's asleep, or half asleep on my left arm.

im typing this with one hand!

anyway its newswriting lecture. and im bored. as usual.

sooooo. (back to two hands now) since the last time i updated, nothing new or interesting has happened.

only that i got a pair of glasses on my face, but that's about it.

umm. ive basically been a complete geek the past two weeks.

school work, movie and playing wow at lan shops. and at home. and at timmy's.

bah you get the drift.

whole advertising group is going to crash ying's place later.

a long way later. its going to be a long boring day.

i wish i had timmy's bed with me now. i really want to sleep.

2007-06-30T12:02:00.001+08:00

hello.

so im at the polyclinic, at the referral part of the whole long and fucking tedious polyclinic-vist phase.

and im in need of a smoke.

i've been hearing fucking babies fucking wail like. nonstop ever since i got in left and right and im going stir crazy.

good thing i brought my laptop. i managed to wow for a little while but then it lagged bad.

so why am i wasting a good, and a pretty fucking well deserved sleep-in saturday morning at a fucking germ infested, BABY FILLED polyclinic?

my eyes are fucking up. i dont have perfect eyesight and im not wearing contacts. basically, im going to go blind in my left eye if i keep wowing and doing mass-comm related work (photoshop) without glasses or something.

and if i DO go blind, and my right eye gets like. i dunno. punctured by a wild sexually deprived parrot, im pretty much fucked and am going on the blind people of singapore register.

i hate polyclinics with a passion.

movie later with Timmy.

that makes this disgusting morning wake up call bearable.

2007-06-29T16:43:00.000+08:00

Ahh.

Advertising is done (for now) and newswriting has been submitted.

This weekend is going to be nothing but sleep, wow, sleep, and did i mention sleep?

This is a very nice feeling. Stoning.

*contented shit eating grin*

i mean, i woke up this morning and i couldnt remember going to bed last night.

maybe i'll go out on sunday. like, shisha or something. sit there and smoke my lungs out for a few hours. nice relaxing thing to do.

or maybe i'll stay home and sleep. or wow. or something.

oh well. off i go!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.

2007-06-28T04:23:00.000+08:00

Happy 9 months baby!

loves!

there, i couldnt start the entry without that. =D

so here we all are, chionging advertising like the bunch of mambo head bobbing red bull fueled addicts that we are.

and we're all going crazy.

cue: whee!

and when 5 girls dressed in short shorts and baggy shirts can make 2am trips to 7-11 without the fear of getting raped, you get an idea of how we look.

bad. very bad.

ok that big ass file Ying was sending to me is sent, so back to work.

bleargh.

2007-06-26T16:38:00.000+08:00

lol blog hopping is fun(ny).

advertising by thursday, newswriting by friday and ACTUALLY DESIGN THE TV PROSET tomorrow.

fuckfuckufckx10.

bleargh.

flying fuckity fuck. fuck a duck and get some luck while rolling around in muck on the back of a pickup truck. you can suck and make a quick buck!

this is not cool. not cool.

and i got to go down to the polyclinic, queue 356832145 hours and wait for another 67876543 hours just to get a damn referal letter.

and then cab down to school.

ok. im going. this is boring.

2007-06-18T02:39:00.000+08:00

hi.

this is a weird time to be blogging. i need to sleep. liek, now.

just watched timmy get whisked off in a cab home. boo.

i love having him over, but i hate seeing him leave. lol duh.

advertising meeting at starbucks tomorrow.

WHICH starbucks, though.

and i hope the money has been fucking approved and is in my account. im close to being really broke, and its not even NEAR the end of the month.

which reminds me, brother's birthday on the like, 19th.

maybe i should take him to iguana and get him wasted on shots or something. sweet 16. lawl.

ahhh. been reading sherlock holmes. damn good read. heart borders' 4-for-3 promo.

dont really feel like wowing. all my quests now need me to party with someone and i dislike having to /1. anyone doing ______ (quest name)? and spend the time waiting for someone to reply me jumping around or... well, jumping around.

especially in arathi. there's no one around but fucking allies who kill you even if you wave. die you stupid bitches. CTRL-1 and gg to you, you fucking-mage-who-thinks-ONE-motherfucking-pyroblast-is-going-to-kill-me.

so NOT going to you noob.

hoho so much for making that sound coherent.

ok i need food. like. now.

HUNGRYYYY.

bb to you.

ilu baby!

2007-06-10T12:12:00.000+08:00

hello.

lets see.

1. i cleared out my room! there's this huge box of trash sitting in the middle of my room waiting to be thrown away.

2. leveled up in wow.

3. my left arrow button is still spoilt.

4. i am STILL in need of a job (looks like that will change pretty soon)

5. i got a new printer. no more freeloading of Timmy's printer. i feel bad, i really do. ink isn't cheap.

6. (i wish i could say i lost 10 kg, but i cant.)

7. i finally restocked my tampon stash. 3 whopping boxes.

8. i finally watched charlotte's web and pirates 3.

(little side note here. i cried watching charlotte's web, though i think the movie wasn't half as good as the book. damn that story, it always gets to me at the part where E.B White writes: "No one was with her when she died." funny how as a kid i never gave it second thought and now i blubber like a sap everytime)

9. my laptop is filthy. i need to mr.brasso it.

10. holidays have started. some holiday.

there we go. 10 new things that happened recently that no one asked me about. loller.

oh.

i think its unfair that we have to live a life that we never even asked for, and not be told exactly why.

therefore,

i LOL, LAWL, LOLLERSK8S and ROFLMAHWAFFLE at life.

if you can even call this a life, that is.

2007-06-03T11:46:00.001+08:00

got a few minutes before i have to go.

FINALLY going to meet Sy.

shopping!

yayayyayaya im psyched. i miss her.

and then timmy afterwards. come to think about it, i see him everyday. wheeee.

ok off i go byebye.

2007-05-29T21:41:00.000+08:00

im a walking mass of contradictions. (i know its normally 'bundle', but mass is just fine)

one minute im so pissed im ready to strangle you, and the next minute im feeling so helpless and wishing i could do something to help.

sigh.

2007-05-28T15:58:00.000+08:00

hate, in most context, isnt a very nice word.

but this time, it couldnt be more fitting.

2007-05-22T19:55:00.000+08:00

i was asking timmy yesterday about what he feared the most, and when he asked me the question in return, it occured to me that i didnt know.

i think i do now.

2007-05-18T22:49:00.000+08:00

i read my christmas and new year entries,

and i realized i have the most fun when certain elements arent involved.

2007-05-17T14:57:00.000+08:00

ah i return from a mini hiatus.

in advertising now, drinking (an oddly sour) bubble tea Vera and i just went to buy.

school has been really exhausting.

i cant wait for the weekend. im going to sleep like i never slept before, wake up, and then do PDI.

curses.

i need a night out (hey yes i see the irony) with my nearest and dearest to just sit at some bar and drink away.

i shudder to think about the final projects, i really do.

2007-05-08T00:36:00.000+08:00

Happy 7 months baby

I love youuuuuu =)

2007-05-07T02:19:00.000+08:00

i believe the national library and i will be on close, intimate terms come the following 2 weeks.

i think im an ungrateful brat,

which is why im thankful for singyi and timmy.

anyway.

PDI presentation tomorrow, its going to be a laugh.

2007-05-03T00:41:00.000+08:00

i came to realize how predictable and routine my life is now.

school, home, timmy's home, town.

rinse and repeat.

and it scares me how comfortable i am.

thinking about it, i know i will be very unwilling to leave this comfort zone.

roughly 2 more years, and then what?

i think im a pretty impulsive and a live-in-the-moment kinda person, but the thought of the future being so uncertain and how this uncertainty saddens me kinda makes me wonder if im more cautious and more of a planner than i thought.

curse the person who (will) invent real future-telling crystal balls for not inventing them sooner.

2007-05-01T20:45:00.000+08:00

a little peek of what i see in school every wednesday. big ass TV production cameras.

school. sigh. all the work is starting to pile up and scarily enough, im still in the holiday mood.

gonna stay back tomorrow and finish some assignments so i'll feel less guilty when im WoW-ing or lazing in bed with some book ive read 10 times over.

that was a pointless entry.

happy labour day y'all.

2007-04-24T23:58:00.000+08:00

i have my own definitions.

you make my world so different.

2007-04-23T22:01:00.000+08:00

im savouring the last few days before school goes insane.

just one week, and assignments and projects are already starting to appear on my to-do list.

the past week was sufficiently entertaining.

went to watch phantom of the opera with timmy and his mom.

it was fucking awesome. the sets, the singers, the costumes, and the music! damn, i wanna watch it again.

saturday saw me, mok, char and nigel helping the year ones with their macs. not surprisingly, adium and everything else not in the presentation was the topic(s) of interest.

then, nerd time!

played monopoly and yes jenga.

like.

mad jenga. lookit the tower man.

and my weekly dose of retarded singyi-ism.

IS today. 'design 10 lamps'.

twisted lamps are cool.

2007-04-21T01:38:00.000+08:00

The Phuket Post.

The Day/Night before

the new majestic!

cammanwhore, he is.

then we went to go meet Dan, Shant and Sarah for drinks at Indochine.

nope, i dont know what's up with the death look either.

that's ciggie smoke blown into the glass

Day One

at the budget terminal

nice word.

me, i dont get the deal but the bottle is cool. absolut is shit but they have the coolest advertising

hell yeah. see the bailey's?

that's pete, shant and dan going up.

In phuket!

ladies and gentlemen we have arrived.

at immigration! if you look closely, it seems like dan is eating timmy's hair.

in the arranged van on the way to the hotel =)

stayed at the Boomerang Inn. checked in and went next door for pizza before exploring town.

The place. =P

then we went back to the room, played a drinking game and er. it was a pretty funny sight.

shant... broke some shower thing in the toilet. cue: what did i dooooooo? =P

pete... died after (OK YES I KNOW) 10 shots, broke the vodka bottle and started licking the floor cause the vodka was there.

i... died after 7 shots, cut my thumb on the broken glass trying to help and crashed back in my room, my face as white as anything according to timmy.

timmy... didnt die. he took so much care of me, i love the boy =)

dan... didnt die but i heard he was laughing at every damn thing.

and of course with the exception of tim and dan, we all puked. =/

everyone was kinda out. we had drinks too before we started the game while in town.

Day Two

(thank god, no hangovers)

food was damn cheap.

first activity!

i didnt jump this time cause i bungeed before and it was expensive, but trust me i had my share of fun watching everyone jump.

at 60m, its supposedly the highest in phuket.

he went first

that's shant falling.

timmy's second

brave smile, it is.

third...

fear! i mean fourth.

then after the adrenaline rush, we all went to some ala subway place opposite our hotel for lunch.

next thing to do: jet ski!

i swear. everyone needs to jet ski off and out into the sunset at least ONCE in their lives. you never feel more free and more alive. it was fucking awesome.

went in the evening. beautiful.

and the sunset? the sunset was beautiful.

(none of these were photoshopped in anyway. not even brightness/contrast)

this is my favourite. makes it look like the entire beach has only the four of us frolicking in the waves.

then we went for dinner at some shisha place!

the shisha is fucking cheap.

$6, and way stronger than the stuff in singapore.

(not orbs ah, water droplets)

LOLOL

and i'll say it again, the food is fucking cheap. and the presentation is awesome. you dont often see those two in the same sentence in singapore

then.. sleep.

Day Three

tour of the islands today.

leaving the dock.

it was a boat ride from hell. you surge and crash with each wave, fucking ow lah.

look at the damn water!

our motor fell off mid journey so we stopped at something-bay to change boats and swim abit.

meet monty, jacob and no-name.

they are hermit crabs in case you're wondering.

just HOW does the water get so turquoise?

that's where the bird's nest come from. swallows build their nest there.

snorkelling next

at monkey beach!

meet peter, the hermit crab whom we took back to the hotel.

Day Four

(beginning of the water festival madness)

supposed to go white water rafting today but everyone was tired so it was free and easy. mostly shopping. and getting sprayed at with water guns. just a little.

check out the clouds.

before going to walk around town

after getting back from town. soaking wet. we ended up buying super soakers to retaliate.

changed and went to Banana disco.

supposed to go there, but we got the date wrong. the beach was completely empty.

Day Five

last day. the day where everyone goes mad throwing water.

yep, that is a fucking seahorse. meet pegasus.

our room. yep there are orbs. 5 to be exact.

their room.

lol mr and mrs smith.

it was like that the ENTIRE stretch.

they smear stuff on your face too.

so timmy goes to go do his cool rasta white dude braids while shant and i take refuge inside.

it was insanity outside.

people on trucks throw water too.

while dan does whatever he is doing...

and

timmy

gets

his

hair

done...

peter is outside getting owned by little kids.

LOL

we walked to the shopping centre. completely sopping wet. dried off a little there and got a tuk tuk back thinking it would be ok.

we got wet again. people actually run up to the tuk tuk when the traffic isnt moving just to throw water at us.

more often than not, icy cold water.

passing trucks.. people with hoses... people with super soakers.

you can imagine. hell lot of water.

so. we finally got back to the hotel, dried up and took off for the airport.

it was nice being dry and watching everyone else get soaked.

it was just like one huge street party. it was definitely an awesome experience and though it hindered my last day shopping, im really thankful we were there in time for the Songkran.

their new year is so cool. and they truly embrace the spirit of it. in singapore, we put up with visiting purely out of greed.

you dont stand to gain anything from throwing water, but people there still do it anyway.

i like their new year more.

ash mountain.

DONE!

now, i hope the bangkok-with-timmy and the japan-with-singyi trips both pull through.

2007-04-20T16:20:00.000+08:00

i got this from www.postsecret.blogspot.com

and under that picture was a message from someone else that read

"Subject: I dated my rapist

I dated mine ... married him ... now 25 years and 3 kids later I'm finally figuring out why I've suffered from depression for so long. Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone."

maybe its because im female, and i despise situations in which women are illtreated or taken advantage of because of their vulnerability.

or maybe its because of the channel 8 dramas i watched as a child about world war 2 where some woman is getting raped by a japanese soldier.

i was affected then, and reading that just affected me again.

oh sure. rape stories are plentiful. sure, ive been hearing it since forever.

maybe my hormones are acting up cause i havent had enough sleep, but im still upset.

sure, you can throw the offender into jail, but does that make a difference?

to the victim? to the victim's family?

a jail term cannot make up for the trauma, and the consequences.

no one does anything anymore. no one says anything.

god the world is fucked up.

yeah i guess complaining about it is not gonna make a difference. nor can i do anything about such issues.

but fuck.

no wonder more and more people are losing faith in the human race.

2007-04-18T23:43:00.000+08:00

i really want to know what would possess someone to go around and start shooting people.

(other than having a screw or two loose, but that's besides the point.)

after reading about the vtech shootings, i felt an ache for the victims, their families and their friends.

and everyone else who is alive and had the close brush with death.

im sure of those who died, those who had it the worse were the ones forced to line up against the wall.

imagine being in that row.

you hear pleas, you hear sobbing, you hear the gunshot and you hear your own heart pounding, knowing that any second, everything is going to fade to black.

imagine knowing that you will be the next to die after the person next to you crumples to the floor.

all those kids. barely half their lives lived and bam. gone. just like that. because one nutter decided to buy two guns and play real life cs.

so much to live for, so much lost.

i think that we all should have a minute of silence out of respect for the deceased and then say a few words of prayer for their families and friends and everyone at vtech.

god knows they need all the strength they can get.

2007-04-18T00:20:00.000+08:00

I WANT MY HOLIDAYS BACK BITCHES.

fucking.

9am-6m. lectures.

and only ONE bloody hour for break.

is not effing cool.

i wonder if the Virginia Tech massacre and the timeliness of it all is symbolic.

like some twisted omen or something.

2007-04-14T19:37:00.000+08:00

welllll.

my 5 day sojourn to the land of a thousand smiles is over.

and im back in singapore.

it was an awesome trip, and i really enjoyed myself. too bad about the shopping. i definitely did not buy enough.

currently finished editing 159 pictures. 150 of timmy's+peter's pics to go.

and then i'll upload em all at one go. =D

until then!

by the way, my boyfriend now looks like a white rasta jamaican dude

and yep, he's still as hot as ever. =D

see?

2007-04-08T01:31:00.000+08:00

packing's a bitch.

anyway.

the week ahead is gonna be amazing.

the new majestic hotel with the darlingboy tomorrow (or later) until monday.

and its off to phuket with him, Dan, Shant and Peter until saturday.

camera's in the bag, so photos photos photos!

i wish i didnt feel so broke though.

or like ive forgotten to pack something. =/

ahhh. screw it.

bring on the sunblock!

2007-04-07T18:00:00.000+08:00

happy 6 months to you baby.

i love you =)

2007-04-06T14:32:00.000+08:00

im feeling so grouchy right about now.

i dont feel like going to work.

i want to crawl back under the covers and sleep.

(preferably with thesillyboy next to me)

but no.

that's not the way life works, is it?

thanks, thanks a-fucking-lot.

2007-04-02T02:00:00.001+08:00

this is probably the dead-est photo ive taken.

zero life.

zero energy.

it even seems cold, y'know?

maybe its just me.

okok weird to start off this entry with emo-ish stuff, since i dont even feel that way.

/edit

i just wrote a whole long entry that i decided to delete because i dont really think its coherent. it makes sense to me because i know what im talking about but i guess no one else will unless i write everything out.

which i wont. because it personal.

but i kept this chunk:

love is such a powerful thing. it does kooky things to your mind, drive you insane, make you so happy that you cry etc etc and yet at the end of the day, despite it sometimes being too deep to fully comprehend, to sometimes even fully appreciate,

you're just grateful that despite your flaws, despite everything that you hate seeing in the mirror, that there's someone there who loves you anyway.

someone who loves you enough to not give up, however tempting, but to teach you and guide you instead.

someone who loves you enough to make you a better person.

someone who loves you enough to not afraid to be harsh with you, because they its for your own good.

and someone who loves you enough to make you be able to love better in return.

thank you timmy,

for everything. especially for loving me.

i love you too =)

because if i have to grow, i want it to be with you.

now,

how do you peel a damn dragonfruit?

2007-03-31T02:34:00.000+08:00

nothing quite like writing a cheesy poem, and then highlighting everything and hitting delete.

i was wondering.

people go on and on about not liking fakes/not being a fake

etc etc along the same rein.

so what happens when you finally get the guts to rip off the mask
and find out that people liked you more before?

why is the fuse getting shorter?

i sense an explosion soon.

2007-03-27T01:10:00.000+08:00

The bad news:

fucking IS server shit fucking kicked me out just when i clicked on French.

)(%$#$%^&*(

so for the next year, i will be learning the wonders of product innovation and design.

(appreciating literary works is still ok)

dammit fuck. SO FUCKING CLOSE CAN CCB.

like mocking me.

The good news:

Same class as Timmydarling! =)

oh well. it MIGHT be interesting.

maybe, just maybe.

2007-03-24T17:32:00.000+08:00

right about now, there are so many sentences running through my head that start with

"i dont fucking like...."

time to go take it out on poor unsuspecting beer bottle caps.

2007-03-21T23:04:00.000+08:00

sentosa, rain, irrigation tunnels, lotsa time under the shower, coconut, card games and boys kissing boys.

the last part is definitely the highlight of the day.

(and no fuck, i dont get off on gay porn)

i dunno.

ever since yesterday, my mind's been whirling with thoughts.

timmytanewen, i love you so damn much =)